Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Frost Bit

If it is 30 below zero in Chicago why did the news report bitter cold in Romania?

Have you noticed that there is an obsession with cold weather reporting lately?  Am I the only human being who really can not tell the difference between 0 degrees Fahrenheit and any amount less than freezing?  Who are they kidding when they claim there are degrees of bitter cold and really I do not care once it is below freezing if the temperature rises to the teens or dips below zero. 

I am schlepping through snow covered streets with far too many layers of clothing this winter and I yearn for the spring, yearn for a light jacket and no hat!  I have worn every single article of clothing in my closet this January.  That's right I am not ashamed that I put my bathing suit on under about five layers of clothing this past week in order to have one more barrier against the frosty Chicago winds.  And that is not even the scariest result of this crazy harsh weather.

In two weeks I will be heading south to help my 86 year old mother and my 92 year old uncle enjoy some fun in the Florida sun.  I was telling a woman I work with today that I am the whitest woman I know.  She suggested a tanning salon and I explained to her that my Irish, Scotch and English skin actually reflects off the water and has been known to blind some aged Floridians after cataract surgery.  Sunglasses do not help.  A lack of vitamin D from the sun has turned my normally chipper nature into a dark and destructive force.  I have made my co-workers weep and I relish the end of day when I can draw the blinds of my frosted windows.

Every day I text or call my sister in Michigan to make sure she is ok and has not succumbed to an inordinate amount of snow being dropped on the other side of Lake Michigan.  We try to picture a future without winter, reminisce about hiking in the hills in the springtime and promise to send postcards if either one of us visit a state that is experiencing above freezing weather.  It is a harsh and yet oddly self satisfying existence.

While many will fight off a few extra pounds in winter, I need only spend my lunch hour shoveling my driveway or my neighbors deck to justify the cake I will eat that night.  I was told by a fellow employee that lowering my thermostat a few more degrees would help my weight loss program.  I never heard of a fitness regime that encourages shedding pounds through hypothermia.

Well dear readers, now that my fingerless gloves are back on my hands I will try to post more often.  I am sorry for the hiatus but I was out shoveling and by the time my mind thawed out I was under the covers trying to get warmed from the cold night's air...     

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